37 Comments
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Michael Woudenberg's avatar

I typically never win anything. It's kind of a joke now.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

Michael, you have won the hearts and minds of more than five thousand souls over on Polymathic Being!

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Michael Woudenberg's avatar

Valid.... Valid.

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Daniel Nest's avatar

Hey that's awesome! Nothing like the feeling of a well-deserved reward.

Also, "We Do It Once A Week?" There's simply no need to brag like that. We married-with-children folks don't need such painful reminders.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

What a weird thing to project onto kids! I'm lucky I didn't end up as a teen beauty contestant with all those issues.

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Daniel Nest's avatar

If you did, $100 could've bought you some nice outfits and left enough to bribe the judges!

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Andrew Smith's avatar

On the other hand, these prudes I grew up with made me cover up the baby's willy on Nevermind, too.

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Brad Kyle's avatar

It just so happens, Andrew, we'll be featuring that grown-up lad on our upcoming Tune Tag! He's in his 30s, now, and I've found a photo where he's recreating that infamous Nirvana cover shot....he's wearing shorts, though!😥

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Andrew Smith's avatar

Thank goodness for shorts! The only other version of that I would accept is Weird Al's famous parody version, "Off the Deep End."

That album is fantastic, by the way!

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Daniel Nest's avatar

I recall they made a documentary about it later called "Free Willy"

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Andrew Smith's avatar

No, you're thinking of the dystopian sequel to "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" that takes a REALLY dark turn, like that infamous "Winnie the Pooh" horror flick.

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j.e. moyer, LPC's avatar

It was 1974. My middle school classmates and I found ourselves improbably thrust into the local limelight. We were quiz show champions, racking up wins for our school and, as a prize, earning a trip to Washington D.C. – a trip that landed us, quite serendipitously, at the now-infamous Watergate Hotel. (If you know your history, a knowing smirk is perfectly acceptable here.) But the real glory wasn't the hotel or the televised victories. It was the ordinary, extraordinary moment walking to school. A complete stranger stopped me, his eyes alight with recognition. "Are you that kid from the quiz show?" Dumbfounded, I could only manage a stammered, "Yes. Yes, I am." His response? "Thank you. You represented our community so well." In that instant, I mattered. My heart, a shriveled little thing before, swelled to Grinch-like proportions, bursting with the realization that a small kid could make a real difference to anyone else.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

That's great! I remember feeling a couple of those little moments of recognition as a kid. I doubt the people who gave those moments to me had any idea how big of a gift they were sharing.

Also: I had the opportunity to sell candy at school to raise money for a similar trip! We went to Chicago, NY, and DC from South Carolina, all very big trips for me as a kid. Way bigger than most of the trips my folks had taken with me.

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Ken Barber's avatar

Yeah, I won something big once. I and my best friend took top honors at the state level with our science project.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

I'm still salty about my middle school science project not getting the recognition I felt it deserved. I wanted to see if gravity and magnetism were related, so I tried to refract a beam of light with a magnet. I think all the science teachers just rolled their eyes, but it was solid work with a null result.

What kind of project did you make, Ken? Was this high school? Spill the beans!

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Bobbitt Smith's avatar

When I was much younger I had such a winning streak whenever names were drawn for prizes. It got kind of embarrassing, and I got so that I expected to win a prize. They weren’t all that big- a meal at a restaurant, a gift card, a silver dollar. I even drew my own name at a choir workshop. Sadly, my lucky streak is no more.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

You'll have to tell me more about the prizes you won!

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Parker McCoy's avatar

"Win an evening for four out at Mark's, a restaurant." LOL. I'm wondering if there's a better description for Mark's, like what kind of food they served? I also love that scene in A Christmas Story. Darren McGavin was so great on there. "Fra-Gee'Lay" LOL. Great post, Andrew.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

"Sounds Italian!" Great performance.

You know, I remember that Mark's was a nice restaurant. Maybe that was like the mic drop moment: you will get to go to... (pause).... Mark's Restaurant. Apparently, I was a LOT better at selling Mark's than the newspaper was!

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Parker McCoy's avatar

You definitely do a better job of selling it. I’d like to see a sign that read “Mark’s, a restaurant”, though. Classic.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

It was an upgrade from the previous "Mark's: technically, a restaurant"

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Sum's avatar

Every Summer the City Parks and Recreation Department held a “Turtle Derby” at a local park. I had recently picked up a turtle on the road leading to our lake cabin, sod I thought, “Good timing, I’ll enter.” The Derby was basically a race from the center of a circle that had been circumscribed on a tennis court. All the turtles were put in an overturned plastic swimming pool to keep them centered until the trade began. Luck had it that my title won! A reporter from the local newspaper was there with a photographer and they interviewed me. After congratulating me they asked, “What is the name of your turtle?” I found myself in panic mode because I had never named the turtle. At the moment it was moving its legs trying to get out of my hands, and scratching me with its claws. In a fit of creativity, I said “Scratch”. And do scratch won that year’s turtle Derby. My name was etched on a bronze plate fastened to the large traveling trophy I was awarded.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

Do you still have the award? I would love to see it!

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Sum's avatar

I had to turn the traveling trophy back on after a year. In return they gave me a tiny plastic trophy that has long disappeared. I still have the picture from the paper somewhere in the detritus of my garage.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

That's great! Photos are all I have of most of these memories. It goes a long way!

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Andrew Sniderman 🕷️'s avatar

When I was a little older than Andrew paperboy extraordinaire, I won a scholarship from the place I took photography classes and it might have been 100 bucks too, certainly no more. It was to setup a gallery at my house with featuring all my friend’s B&W prints. I put in track lights, had an opening—wonder what I served. I also ‘commissioned’ a friend to paint an amazing mural of a spaceship around the entry.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

That's a cool memory! $100 was an awful lot back then, too - I think folks might not realize that my first semester of college tuition (albeit, in-state) was $1500 (and I got a discount on that, too).

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Andrew Sniderman 🕷️'s avatar

I wanna say mine was $600 (also in state)

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Andrew Smith's avatar

Sounds right. First year was 93 for me. I got something like an alumni scholarship for $200 because my dad went there and some $500 academic scholarship to boot, so it was crazy affordable. Also: my folks did me right and gave me everything I needed to be successful those first couple of years, even picking up the tuition slack at first.

All of this in combination made it possible for me to pay for college as I went, something almost unimaginable these days.

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Andrew Sniderman 🕷️'s avatar

‘83. Just finished putting my kids through. Instate is around 30K now; $60K+ for out of state.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

"Just flip burgers and pay your way like I did!"

"Okay, dad. I'll start saving 300 years ago, BRB."

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Andrew Sniderman 🕷️'s avatar

Insane in the membrane; started saving the day they were born. First college job was hot runner followed closely by bagel cutter, but that was because I wanted mad money. My parents paid for my undergrad

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David Perlmutter's avatar

Other than a couple of minor scholarships during university, no big awards. But I continue to submit stories for award seasons and contests.

Darren McGavin did a great job as the father in "Christmas Story", but the whole "you'll shoot your eye out" sequence tends to be more of what people remember from that film.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

Oh yes. I recall going down a rabbit hole about that lore recently too! There's always a story behind the story.

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