Have you ever cracked a joke, assuming that your audience understands that you’re being ironic or sarcastic, only to find out that many (or most) of them took the joke literally? This happens so often on the internet that there’s a term we use to describe it:
Dad jokes are always funny online. In fact, some of the best just don't work when spoken. Like a response to Grammar Nazis where you reply "There, Their, They're, it'll be OK."
I feel like the things I say are constantly misunderstood. Whether it’s jokes or just being proud of myself for something I’ve worked hard at, or my ridiculously bad grammar. Honestly, I don’t know if people really don’t understand me, or the desire to knock a woman down a peg who feels comfortable in her own skin is too great to resist.
Either way, I can’t please everyone and if someone has a question and they know me, then they know I’ll hold space for them and my heart is genuine. If they want to make a projection or fast assumption through their lens that is possibly incorrect without seeking to understand- I try to just let them. I can’t please everyone and I’m not here to be understood by everyone, just the ones that are meant for me. 💛
I feel this. I have to be myself, but I also have some obligation not to make the world a worse place. Language (and an audience) loads everything up with that potential, so I try to navigate somewhat cautiously. I do think it's different when you have a more intimate group of folks, though.
Misogyny is out there everywhere, and it could be some of what's going on, for sure. I face other issues along similar (but different) lines, too. At the same time, I myself don't want to fall into the trap of assuming I can't communicate more clearly. Language is, after all, a two way street!
That is true, and I too need to make sure I’m not being too lazy in how I communicate by assuming everyone knows I’m joking or that I just can’t spell or meant wouldn’t instead of would etc.. I do my best to edit, but life in the fast lane of managing kids does make me a bit more forgetful than I used to be. You bring up excellent points and it’s something we can all be a bit better at for sure. I’m not in a position of influence or the owner of a business. I can’t imagine the nuance you have to filter through daily, I don’t think I could do it very well at all.
It's tough, but you do tend to get better over time (being forced to tip toe definitely causes you to become proficient, or at least try to!). Life really does move fast, and (returning to the other side of the equation) I do find myself giving more and more folks the benefit of the doubt. I wish more folks would do this, but the reality is that most folks are not accustomed to that mindset.
I think, or for me, it comes with age and experience. Most people are doing their best and it’s truly not personal and when I can give the benefit of the doubt that I am probably not understanding something or someone not understanding me- it definitely leaves room for all the underlying context or nuance I could be missing. You’re doing great, Andrew! And you remind be that I could be doing a bit better to slow down and prevent unnecessary miscommunication. Glad I stopped in today. This was a good read.
Great points. I find that text can become very tone agnostic and you end up someone's relying a lot on your assumptions of what you think people are usually like.
In real life when I was younger, my dad and I used to make the most absurd jokes and it would just fly so far over people's heads out mimicked the entirety of earth's atmosphere.
Their straight-faced reactions would make it all the more funny.
The live studio audience wasn't present for absolutely every piece- there was a great deal of material that was first filmed on location and then shown during the show. But having the audience was standard for comedy shows in both the U.S. and U.K. then- either an actual live audience or a laugh track culled from the response of earlier audiences.
It helped that they were all experienced performers. Graham Chapman, John Cleese and Eric Idle had been part of Cambridge University's dramatic society, The Footlights, and all of them had logged time performing and/or writing for British TV shows before they teamed up.
Sadly it's not you. The downside of the Internet is that you cannot take a position, no matter how absurd, that you can't find someone arguing earnestly in favor of it.
But at least when you do you get to use this clip!
I once read that putting an emoji or typing "jk" after a joke is a think folks over 35 do and the youngins tend to cringe. Like "yeah we know it's a joke". But I also feel that a ton of tone gets lost on social media... like how someone can get get upset and argumentative after reading something fairly innocuous. For instance, I could post "Elon Musk has no Ws in his name" and someone will likely have a strong opinion on what they presume o be my reasoning for sharing that. Also, I feel like my current cognitive deficits make me bad at picking up subtext and sarcasm for whatever reason. It doesn't help that I've always had a dry sense of humor so I often commit the same offense that gives me trouble. BUT THE RULES DON'T APPLY TO ME! lol.
See what I did there? Also, I don't remember my point.
"E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies!"
Ha! I am the guy in the back of the room hurling smart ass comments at the speaker; I'm the guy at meetings who cracks jokes in the pauses and then looks around to see who's laughing. If I'm lucky maybe 10% gets a chuckle, less than 1% an actual laugh. I'm just trying to have fun, but jeesh so many people get torqued about it!😂
Not really...it makes me appreciate how hard stand-up comedians work, hitting clubs every night trying out material, changing it around, finally getting to a set that makes you laugh from beginning to end. It's hard work being funny! As for people who don't have a sense of humor..."I blow my nose at you! I wave my privates at your aunties you silly English king!"😂🤣😂🤣
I'm a joke mangler myself but love humor from silly dancing/pratfalls to intellectual humor like Tom Lehrer's. I remember watching Monty Python's Flying Circus as a teenager (on one of our three channels) and finding it hilarious. Regarding being misunderstood, thinking back to the same era, I was keenly aware that high school boys would twist the most innocent comment into puerile sexual innuendo. To this day, I edit myself proactively to avoid a problem long gone.
To be honest...I had brain surgery for Epilepsy in 2003 and before that time, although I was wonderful with remembering lyrics, etc. I simply wouldn't get all jokes. They wouldn't fully register. The jokes that did fully register were too funny to me and some where rather obvious in that movie. Anything having to do with Religion I wouldn't understand as a joke though. Due to that, there was no way of offending me. I didn't understand the differences in Religions, etc. I REALLY didn't.
I suppose some would find certain things offensive today but unless they were created to offend, I personally don't find them offensive. Nothing in Monty Python was created to offend. If I'm correct it was simply created to make people laugh and laughter brings joy to the world.
The song "Always look on the bright side of Life" has been one that I've watched many times for a laugh when I needed it. I've had VERY VERY HARD times in my life that sadly I simply couldn't cross out when listening to this because they hit the nail on head of them.
I love the lyrics
If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle, that's the thing
There's also:
For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow
Forget about your sin
Give the audience a grin
Enjoy it, it's your last chance anyhow
Lastly:
Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughin' as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you
I love that song...it's actually a joke but it's also very true!
I'm NOT a hugely Religious person though. I'm more of a hugely Spiritual person so his being on a cross really doesn't offend me at all. Even today when I fully get it.
Seeing as how many in history have been harmed, etc. Joan of Arc, etc. many even today, that's actually a HUGE statement...or I think it is. He had alot of guts to do that. I think it's commendable personally.
The castle in the first Monty Python movie was offered to my great-grandfather too! Mary Queen of Scots was my 11th great-aunt...... My great-grandfather just didn't take it because he wasn't wealthy and I assume didn't fully understand either. Whenever I see that castle I can't help wondering what room I would have had growing up there. That's a REALLY idiotic thing to wonder I guess but I wonder it all the same. I'm sure that you don't believe that but it true.
I have the same Epilepsy that Prince John passed of because they didn't have the correct treatment in his time. Prince John was Queen Elizabeth lls uncle or would have been if he had lived.
Anyway, I'm glad that castle is taken care of by the historical society there today! It's far off family but it still holds my family history in it. It's weird to think that my ancestors walked those halls. I'm sooo glad that it's taken care of. I truly am.
This also does NOT mean that I'm wealthy! There are LOADS of DISTANT relatives that the Royal Family has.
Anyway great post!!! Thanks for the reminder. :) It made me smile.
P.S. When you look at my photo do you see a resemblance with the late queen or Kate Middleton?
That's an awesome castle! Monty Python found it last minute, too, and it was the only castle they had for the entire Holy Grail film. I love how they just used the props (or lack thereof) in that film.
I'm not sure about the resemblance to the Queen, but I can probably see hints of it in your profile!
In all honesty, I think it also truly depends on the view. In some pictures it’s rather obvious to me but in others it’s not so obvious. Plus, I had a seizure in my teens that knocked me flat on my face. My nose was broken and blood went EVERYWHERE! I scared the class half to death but when a stretcher was taking me away a kid came up to me and said “I bet the other guy looks worse!” That made me laugh a bit. Laughter is the best medicine sometimes. My point, I’m surprised that my nose looks like them at all. They tried to straighten it but I’ve had a couple operations over the years to help me breath because that didn’t fully work. Poor kids in my class…. that must have scared them to death!
Oh the teacher didn't say that, another kid did! It was very impressive! It made me smile that's certain. I got auras telling me when I was going to have a seizure and so my friends told me to go inside and sit down. I went in my favourite class...my music class! I scared the living **** outa my teacher... She was checking her computer for one second while I sat down. My body got up on it's own though, all my muscles froze and BAM I fell flat on my face! Probably scared the other kids too too though. That was ALOT of blood.
I don’t know THAT much about Doune caste. It sounds like you might know more! Please fill me in. I’m so curious! My not knowing much about a castle from my own family history makes me feel like such a loser! What do you know about it!?! They found it last minute for that movie, really!? I wonder what it’s like there. Does anyone live there anymore or is it ONLY for movies if the historical society helps it? I did find some things up years ago. That’s how I know which owns it today. I wish I were rich I’d live out of it, keep it up and let certain movies, shows be made there. I’d have a team to help me though if I were that rich. It’d be one less thing for others to keep up. I wouldn’t always be there though because if I were that rich I’d live out of a trailer and hire a driver so I could travel the world. I’m a dreamer, I know!
I just recently watched a good Monty Python documentary that's currently on Netflix, and they talk a little about the castle and how they got to use it! Check it out; the doc is good anyway and (IMO) worth watching just for fun.
Is it a recent documentary or is it the one on prime too made in 2005? How many documentaries did they make? Kinda cool!!! Although it was made so long ago, I kinda doubt there would be any recent ones.
Dad jokes are always funny online. In fact, some of the best just don't work when spoken. Like a response to Grammar Nazis where you reply "There, Their, They're, it'll be OK."
I feel like the things I say are constantly misunderstood. Whether it’s jokes or just being proud of myself for something I’ve worked hard at, or my ridiculously bad grammar. Honestly, I don’t know if people really don’t understand me, or the desire to knock a woman down a peg who feels comfortable in her own skin is too great to resist.
Either way, I can’t please everyone and if someone has a question and they know me, then they know I’ll hold space for them and my heart is genuine. If they want to make a projection or fast assumption through their lens that is possibly incorrect without seeking to understand- I try to just let them. I can’t please everyone and I’m not here to be understood by everyone, just the ones that are meant for me. 💛
I feel this. I have to be myself, but I also have some obligation not to make the world a worse place. Language (and an audience) loads everything up with that potential, so I try to navigate somewhat cautiously. I do think it's different when you have a more intimate group of folks, though.
Misogyny is out there everywhere, and it could be some of what's going on, for sure. I face other issues along similar (but different) lines, too. At the same time, I myself don't want to fall into the trap of assuming I can't communicate more clearly. Language is, after all, a two way street!
That is true, and I too need to make sure I’m not being too lazy in how I communicate by assuming everyone knows I’m joking or that I just can’t spell or meant wouldn’t instead of would etc.. I do my best to edit, but life in the fast lane of managing kids does make me a bit more forgetful than I used to be. You bring up excellent points and it’s something we can all be a bit better at for sure. I’m not in a position of influence or the owner of a business. I can’t imagine the nuance you have to filter through daily, I don’t think I could do it very well at all.
It's tough, but you do tend to get better over time (being forced to tip toe definitely causes you to become proficient, or at least try to!). Life really does move fast, and (returning to the other side of the equation) I do find myself giving more and more folks the benefit of the doubt. I wish more folks would do this, but the reality is that most folks are not accustomed to that mindset.
I think, or for me, it comes with age and experience. Most people are doing their best and it’s truly not personal and when I can give the benefit of the doubt that I am probably not understanding something or someone not understanding me- it definitely leaves room for all the underlying context or nuance I could be missing. You’re doing great, Andrew! And you remind be that I could be doing a bit better to slow down and prevent unnecessary miscommunication. Glad I stopped in today. This was a good read.
Monty Python and the Holy Grail is my favorite. Absurdism is funny in general to me.
I think it's number one for me, too.
Me too - love that one.
I've resorted to absurdism more and more in real life lately. It's my favorite humor as well.
In fact, I have a rule for my writing that something impossibly absurd must happen in every article.
I also am a commonsewer of poop jokes!
Poop is near and dear to my shart.
Er, heart.
Great points. I find that text can become very tone agnostic and you end up someone's relying a lot on your assumptions of what you think people are usually like.
In real life when I was younger, my dad and I used to make the most absurd jokes and it would just fly so far over people's heads out mimicked the entirety of earth's atmosphere.
Their straight-faced reactions would make it all the more funny.
I miss those halcyon days!
Luckily, I never face such issues, because I never attempt something as silly and wasteful as humor in my posts or comments. I'm a serious man.
As for my favorite Monty Python sketch, it's probably this one: https://cdn.midjourney.com/43190199-6ed0-4019-bfd7-2c265acced04/0_2.png
That's not a bad sketch!
Thanks, I prompted it myself. Took all my years of prompt engineering experience and at least 20-30 seconds of dedicated typing effort.
Too bad an LLM can't give you a carpal tunnel massage.
Yet.
The live studio audience wasn't present for absolutely every piece- there was a great deal of material that was first filmed on location and then shown during the show. But having the audience was standard for comedy shows in both the U.S. and U.K. then- either an actual live audience or a laugh track culled from the response of earlier audiences.
It helped that they were all experienced performers. Graham Chapman, John Cleese and Eric Idle had been part of Cambridge University's dramatic society, The Footlights, and all of them had logged time performing and/or writing for British TV shows before they teamed up.
100%. Have you seen the five or six part doc Netflix has up right now? It's very good.
The struggle of deadpan v emoji use is real 🤪
I hate it! But it's reality.
I am heartened to know I'm not the only one 💚
Sadly it's not you. The downside of the Internet is that you cannot take a position, no matter how absurd, that you can't find someone arguing earnestly in favor of it.
But at least when you do you get to use this clip!
https://youtu.be/_n5E7feJHw0?si=D90LNHJWPe-tP9Ao
Favorite sketch.... Deja Vu. Did we talk about this before?
The absurdist path is fraught with peril. Go forth and conquer or at least attempt a silly walk. Also, 42.
I once read that putting an emoji or typing "jk" after a joke is a think folks over 35 do and the youngins tend to cringe. Like "yeah we know it's a joke". But I also feel that a ton of tone gets lost on social media... like how someone can get get upset and argumentative after reading something fairly innocuous. For instance, I could post "Elon Musk has no Ws in his name" and someone will likely have a strong opinion on what they presume o be my reasoning for sharing that. Also, I feel like my current cognitive deficits make me bad at picking up subtext and sarcasm for whatever reason. It doesn't help that I've always had a dry sense of humor so I often commit the same offense that gives me trouble. BUT THE RULES DON'T APPLY TO ME! lol.
See what I did there? Also, I don't remember my point.
You had a point? JK lol
"E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies!"
They quoted this at Chapman's funeral, no kidding. <3
Ha! I am the guy in the back of the room hurling smart ass comments at the speaker; I'm the guy at meetings who cracks jokes in the pauses and then looks around to see who's laughing. If I'm lucky maybe 10% gets a chuckle, less than 1% an actual laugh. I'm just trying to have fun, but jeesh so many people get torqued about it!😂
Very frustrating!
Not really...it makes me appreciate how hard stand-up comedians work, hitting clubs every night trying out material, changing it around, finally getting to a set that makes you laugh from beginning to end. It's hard work being funny! As for people who don't have a sense of humor..."I blow my nose at you! I wave my privates at your aunties you silly English king!"😂🤣😂🤣
What an incredible series of insults those geniuses came up with all those years ago! I revisit that scene probably at least once a week.
I always loved "Your mother was a hamsterrrrrr, and your father smelt of elderberries!"😂🤣😂🤣
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second TYYYYMMMMUUUHHHHH!!!
😂🤣😂🤣😂
I'm a joke mangler myself but love humor from silly dancing/pratfalls to intellectual humor like Tom Lehrer's. I remember watching Monty Python's Flying Circus as a teenager (on one of our three channels) and finding it hilarious. Regarding being misunderstood, thinking back to the same era, I was keenly aware that high school boys would twist the most innocent comment into puerile sexual innuendo. To this day, I edit myself proactively to avoid a problem long gone.
I also like to go back and edit, even if it's only for my own peace of mind.
Coconuts anyone? *Wink wink*
To be honest...I had brain surgery for Epilepsy in 2003 and before that time, although I was wonderful with remembering lyrics, etc. I simply wouldn't get all jokes. They wouldn't fully register. The jokes that did fully register were too funny to me and some where rather obvious in that movie. Anything having to do with Religion I wouldn't understand as a joke though. Due to that, there was no way of offending me. I didn't understand the differences in Religions, etc. I REALLY didn't.
I suppose some would find certain things offensive today but unless they were created to offend, I personally don't find them offensive. Nothing in Monty Python was created to offend. If I'm correct it was simply created to make people laugh and laughter brings joy to the world.
The song "Always look on the bright side of Life" has been one that I've watched many times for a laugh when I needed it. I've had VERY VERY HARD times in my life that sadly I simply couldn't cross out when listening to this because they hit the nail on head of them.
I love the lyrics
If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle, that's the thing
There's also:
For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow
Forget about your sin
Give the audience a grin
Enjoy it, it's your last chance anyhow
Lastly:
Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughin' as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you
I love that song...it's actually a joke but it's also very true!
I'm NOT a hugely Religious person though. I'm more of a hugely Spiritual person so his being on a cross really doesn't offend me at all. Even today when I fully get it.
Seeing as how many in history have been harmed, etc. Joan of Arc, etc. many even today, that's actually a HUGE statement...or I think it is. He had alot of guts to do that. I think it's commendable personally.
There's also this I have to share!!! Check it out! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrdEMERq8MA
The castle in the first Monty Python movie was offered to my great-grandfather too! Mary Queen of Scots was my 11th great-aunt...... My great-grandfather just didn't take it because he wasn't wealthy and I assume didn't fully understand either. Whenever I see that castle I can't help wondering what room I would have had growing up there. That's a REALLY idiotic thing to wonder I guess but I wonder it all the same. I'm sure that you don't believe that but it true.
I have the same Epilepsy that Prince John passed of because they didn't have the correct treatment in his time. Prince John was Queen Elizabeth lls uncle or would have been if he had lived.
Anyway, I'm glad that castle is taken care of by the historical society there today! It's far off family but it still holds my family history in it. It's weird to think that my ancestors walked those halls. I'm sooo glad that it's taken care of. I truly am.
This also does NOT mean that I'm wealthy! There are LOADS of DISTANT relatives that the Royal Family has.
Anyway great post!!! Thanks for the reminder. :) It made me smile.
P.S. When you look at my photo do you see a resemblance with the late queen or Kate Middleton?
That's an awesome castle! Monty Python found it last minute, too, and it was the only castle they had for the entire Holy Grail film. I love how they just used the props (or lack thereof) in that film.
I'm not sure about the resemblance to the Queen, but I can probably see hints of it in your profile!
In all honesty, I think it also truly depends on the view. In some pictures it’s rather obvious to me but in others it’s not so obvious. Plus, I had a seizure in my teens that knocked me flat on my face. My nose was broken and blood went EVERYWHERE! I scared the class half to death but when a stretcher was taking me away a kid came up to me and said “I bet the other guy looks worse!” That made me laugh a bit. Laughter is the best medicine sometimes. My point, I’m surprised that my nose looks like them at all. They tried to straighten it but I’ve had a couple operations over the years to help me breath because that didn’t fully work. Poor kids in my class…. that must have scared them to death!
Dang! Glad your teacher said that, though. That's an awesome quip.
Oh the teacher didn't say that, another kid did! It was very impressive! It made me smile that's certain. I got auras telling me when I was going to have a seizure and so my friends told me to go inside and sit down. I went in my favourite class...my music class! I scared the living **** outa my teacher... She was checking her computer for one second while I sat down. My body got up on it's own though, all my muscles froze and BAM I fell flat on my face! Probably scared the other kids too too though. That was ALOT of blood.
I don’t know THAT much about Doune caste. It sounds like you might know more! Please fill me in. I’m so curious! My not knowing much about a castle from my own family history makes me feel like such a loser! What do you know about it!?! They found it last minute for that movie, really!? I wonder what it’s like there. Does anyone live there anymore or is it ONLY for movies if the historical society helps it? I did find some things up years ago. That’s how I know which owns it today. I wish I were rich I’d live out of it, keep it up and let certain movies, shows be made there. I’d have a team to help me though if I were that rich. It’d be one less thing for others to keep up. I wouldn’t always be there though because if I were that rich I’d live out of a trailer and hire a driver so I could travel the world. I’m a dreamer, I know!
I just recently watched a good Monty Python documentary that's currently on Netflix, and they talk a little about the castle and how they got to use it! Check it out; the doc is good anyway and (IMO) worth watching just for fun.
Is it a recent documentary or is it the one on prime too made in 2005? How many documentaries did they make? Kinda cool!!! Although it was made so long ago, I kinda doubt there would be any recent ones.
It's this one from 2009: https://www.netflix.com/title/70213237
I'll check it out.
Like you, I have a pretty deep knowledge of the Pythons, but I really enjoyed it. I'm sure you will too if you haven't already seen it.